id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
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