david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
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