I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
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