two words: eviction party
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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