The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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