If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
