Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
