the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
Randomize