just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize