I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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