Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Randomize
