I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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