Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Randomize