idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
...so i touched it.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
