last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
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