I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
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