get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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