my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
