Your mouth is God's brothel.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
last night I used snow as a chaser
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