3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize