he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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