No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize
