New low: just hacked my moms facebook
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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