she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
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Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
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Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?