Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.