Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
