Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
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