Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize
