New low: just hacked my moms facebook
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
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