She's like a pop up book from hell.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Randomize
