Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
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