Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
