Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
it glows. i had to have it.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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