What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
