TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
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