Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
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