Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
Pooping to opera.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
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