Whats the glycemic index on semen?
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Randomize
