I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize