Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
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