I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
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