Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
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