FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Randomize
