My nipple is on Facebook.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
Someone shattered a urinal.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
He's a Shit stain on my heart
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize