Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
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