GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize