ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
I'm both gender and math confused
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
