I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
