Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize
