i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
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