Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
That's how pantless uber rides happen
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
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