three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
