I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
